I Can't Even Pronounce It

My uncle and I just returned from the annual festival that takes place in Hannover around the large lake in the middle of town.

He and I were standing there, drinking a beer and discussing why it had been difficult to talk to German girls, and how they hadn't really been interested in talking much with me. The two cute German girls next to us seemed to notice.

Later, when Mark came back with potato pancakes for me and him, we didn't have any forks. I went to the booth nearby, and could only find two toothpick-like forks, but they seemed to work fine.

The girls laughed, then said something to us in German.

Me: I think they just made fun of us.
Mark: Yeah, they just told you that you had a very small stick.

And so it goes.

That wasn't even the silliest interaction of the day with a German female.

A middle-aged German woman literally yelled at me while in line for train tickets, because she was convinced there was an open ticket counter among the long row of ticket counters and that I wasn't heading for it. YELLED.

I didn't think there was one open in the direction she was pointing, but I walked down there anyway....and it was closed. She continued to yell at me. People were laughing (at her? at me? at life? I hoped at her). Finally, I just stood there, scanning for another open ticket counter, until one came open. On my way to it, I had to pass the yelling woman again. She yelled something else at me, even though it was clear to me, the train company, and every single other person in line that she had been wrong. Maybe she was yelling an apology as I walked past. Or maybe it was "Your stick is very small!!!"

It was confusing. And a little scary.

I've spent the last few days in Germany reading The Golden Compass and hanging out with my 10 year old cousin Reid. Some of that time has been spent watching a cartoon called Chowder . It is the weirdest cartoon ever. Reid gets mad because I have been singing to him "Chowder's not your boyfriend, Chowder's not your boyfriend." But he's not mad that he's not Chowder's boyfriend, he's mad because I'm getting the words to the song wrong. I have no idea what the real words are, I just know they involve "Chowder" and "boyfriend."

Speaking of fantastic songs that Reid loves, a major watershed moment in male Hewett bonding was when Reid felt comfortable enough around me to belt this one out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Be6jlCuMvVQ

Tomorrow I head to Poland. To Poznan, Poland. Then on to Wroclaw, Poland.

Today, before buying my train ticket to Wroclaw, I realized that I had absolutely no idea how to pronounce "Wroclaw." Matters are complicated by the slash through the "L" in the word. According to someone on Tripadvisor.com, the town is pronounced:
Vro-tz-wav - Wrocław.

There it is, the little slash in the "L". Good times.